Just had a realization

I think after writing everything all out, it kinda put things into perspective. And i feel better now cause I cant change what he wants and i cant convince him to be with me. I cant make him be friends with me. All i can really do is just stop wondering if he has someone else. But the thing is I think him losing his job has a huge part of why we arent together and well I dont have time to try to convince him to be with me. And if he really wanted to be with me, he would've made some kind of contact with me. If he really, truly doesnt wanna lose me, he would try to make contact with me in some way. But yeah hes not and I cant stress about this anymore. I start a new job on Monday and I just got a really cute haircut and am gonna go out and enjoy myself and find someone who will want to be with me